Fellowship Versus Brotherhood
Men say that they want brotherhood. However, the question is, “what price are you willing to pay?” Mickey Mantle said when he was sitting in a bar watching a baseball game after he had retired from the Yankees, “I should be out there playing. But what I really miss is the locker room, the brotherhood of the guys on the team.”
When Pete started his men’s ministry, he asked, “what are men like today? What are their core values and what do they value when it comes to the church? He knew the statistics that said that if men are faithful followers of Christ, 90 percent of their families receive Christ. However, only 17 percent of families come to faith if only the wife is a Christian.
When you call a man in the church “man of God,” he’ll usually look away. When you ask him why he’s ashamed, he’ll say, “because I feel unworthy.” The world’s man code says that we’re what we make of ourselves and that grace doesn’t matter. It teaches that the goal is to be a self made man. We’re taught to resist receiving anything as a gift of grace. However, according to Ephesians 2:8, by grace are ye saved by faith and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God not of works lest any man should boast.
The devil’s tactic is to take men of God off of the spiritual battlefield. Great cultures and nations always fail from within. It’s not other nations that conquer a great civilization, but by corruption from within.
Ephesians 6 is about the armor of God. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against spiritual wickedness from on high. Every sphere of influence whether family, government, education, entertainment, and even churches are weakened from within when they forsake the spiritual armor of God and are overtaken by the powers of darkness. When factions fight for power in the voting booth, the president’s world view will be forced on the culture. However, even if we elect a Christian president, the culture has already been infiltrated by spiritual wickedness in the halls of power.
God will allow persecution inside and outside the church to purge the culture to find out who the real Christians are. According to the flesh, it’s difficult to discern who’s really a Christian. The regular Christian man feels fearful, insecure, inadequate and lonely. He’s casual relationally with Jesus and with others. Casual Christians are casualties in the spiritual battle. The average guy is under challenged and has no mission to which he can commit his life. The church asks us to give faithfully, to attend regularly and to serve diligently. However, the church often fails to emphasize the main question, “how’s your walk with God?”
The normal Christian guy is stressed and struggles with guilt and shame. He struggles with being a cultural Christian rather than a Biblical Christian. He may have father-wounds because his dad never said, “son I live you.” His dad never helped him spiritually or morally. He’s overcome by the “lust of the flesh.” He’s angry but can’t quite put his finger on the cause of his anger. He has problems with his marriage and doesn’t pray for or with his wife. He can’t communicate with her like she wants and needs for him to communicate from the depth of his heart. He never has a date night with his wife and will not attend marriage retreats or conferences with her. He knows that he doesn’t give enough, serve enough, pray enough, read his bible enough, or love enough. He spends most of his time in sin management rather living in God’s grace, mercy, forgiveness and love. He’s terrified of losing control and feels uncomfortable on spiritual turf. He fears rejection and avoids situations where he may be asked to pray out loud or participate in meaningful biblical discussions.
Even deacons and elders in many churches realize they don’t really have a deep, committed, and abiding relationship with their Lord and with the Word of God.
The normal Christian guy is more comfortable isolating himself when he’s struggling and in pain. It’s difficult for him to ask for help from other men. He finds his identity in his job, his bank accounts, his possessions and in his worldly successes. He avoids spending time and sharing his heart with a group of intimate friends. He doesn’t know how to work out his own salvation in the marketplace and in the culture. Men who feel this way in church are the weak ones whom the devil picks off.
When a pastor asked Pete what he wanted to do in men’s ministry, Pete said, I’ve been studying about the role of men in the Christian family. When the plaster reported to the board about this topic for the men’s ministry, they said, “we don’t want to be taught about that. We don’t think we really need to be reminded about our shortcomings.” Pete thanked the pastor for telling him that the church wasn’t ready to be reproved….they weren’t willing to admit that they had a problem.
What’s the difference between brotherhood and fellowship? There are several scriptures about brotherhood. These include: Proverbs 18:24; John 15:13; 1 Peter 2:17; 1 Peter 1:22; Romans 12:10; Ephesians 4:12; and Proverbs 27:17. The essence of the word “fellowship” is our allotment, our share… that which we hold in common or in partnership. It’s also translated as “communion” or co-Union. The dictionary definition of “brotherhood” is “the state of being brothers.” Intimate Brotherhood goes far beyond casual fellowship within the church.
Men who go through combat together know what it means to have a “band of brothers.” Brothers in arms are bound by a blood covenant. It means that I’ll give my blood to save my brother….that I have his back and he’s got mine. Men in battle are willing to die for their brothers… to shed their own blood in order that their brother might live. They have come to the conclusion that if there is nothing worth dying for, then there is nothing worth living for.
Jesus Christ shed his innocent blood on our behalf. There is no redemption without the shedding of blood. He gave his life so that we could live in the newness of spiritual life. He’s our blood brother, the firstborn among many brethren. For he who was without sin became the perfect sin sacrifice on our behalf that we may be made the righteousness of God in Him. What should be our response? As brothers of the son of God and brothers in Christ we can live according to Galatians 2:20: “I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.”
As brothers of the Son of God, may we ever live to the praise of the glory of His grace!
Your brother in Christ,
Michael